Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Advertising 101

I do NOT understand why if you are going to sell a horse, ANY HORSE for more than $10,000 why in the HELL you post the world's shittiest pictures in existence!!! Let alone a horse for $80,000 *woosy*

So as usual I have scoured the Internet for these gems, so away we GO!!!!

For the love of...!!! WTF is this shit?!?!?!?!?! OH yes, and they would like $80,000 for this gem... The horse looks great, nice bascule, tucks those legs up nice and tight. But um hello!!! Heels up much???? Helmet???? You would be better off photo shopping this douche-bag OUT of the fucking picture!!!

Hey! Quit Cluster-fucking your god damn ads up with all the nonsense! It's Obnoxious. I want to see 1 thing and 1 thing only the horse!!! $30,000 for this guy!

WHOA!!! Fucking Back Lit much!?!?!?!?!? This horse is a private treaty, so you can guarantee he's way too much money!!!

For $50,000 do you think we could hold the camera straight????

Is a camera with flash to much to ask for???? No? Can't do that? Are we asking too much???
All these horses are really nice, and probably well worth the money, but the pics just crack me up!!!! I mean the photos are the very FIRST thing that you notice in an ad and this is the BEST you can do??? LMAO!!!


JamieC said...

See, the problem is, they haven't yet sold their horses, so they can't AFFORD a nice camera, or to pay someone to take a decent picture. That's the whole problem, right there! It's a vicious cycle, really.

2toads2luv said...

Dude, you crack me up. These PICTURES crack me up!! I mean, really??? It just makes ya want to ask, what the hell are you thinking?

Nd_Appy said...

Seeing pictures like that just makes me want to *headdesk*....


GoLightly said...

Oh, stop with the heels and the helmet crap. Honestly. I'm afraid Kathy Kusner, Rodney Jenkins and several other gazillion people, have popped a heel up, here or there. Beth Underhill, greatest rider, I've got pics of her slipping her heel, when her horse Altair explodes underneath her. It's hard to equitate, when the horse is 'booting you out of the tack. This might be the horses' first oxer, for all we know. It sure looks like a schooling situation.
Helmets good, yeah. Us grown ups are allowed to wear one, or not. He's a not. So what?? They don't protect you when the horse falls on you. Many years ago, my fifth or sixth horse show, a helmeted kid died, underneath her horse. My Mom was there. Really undermined my "horses in my life please?" cause.

I know, what would George say! His boots aren't even polished, OMFG, he's not even wearing BOOTS.
"shudders" The horse is spectacular, the rider is invisible. He's got a nice thing going with this horse. Maybe he's the groom, and it's his one shot at fame.

And, why then, aren't western peoples wearing helmets?
Oh, I forgot, western horses never fall

Virginia's Stupid Drivers said...

2nd to last just could be the angle of the hill.

Of course you have to have the smartass posting in the replies here. Helmets are like politics in the real world.

GoLightly said...

Ahh, the sneer factor. It's so attractive in horse land.
Problem is I am actually from the real world.
Ok, I'll keep this short/simpler. I am for sure a smart ass. Hello, and welcome to you, too.
All should wear the head protection. Especially kids, learning, goes without saying. But a groom, out the back of a horse show? The guy is not a bad rider. Nice hands. He's not strangling the horse in any way at all. his horse has exploded over the fence. What, has that NEVER happened to you?? Then you aren't riding jumpers.
Pick apart Eric Lamaze's equitation. Please.
But put on pictures of "real bad" riders riding, next time. Not just "not pretty" bad.

Amanda Nicole said...

I, for one, agree with you that if you are trying to sell a horse, you should not be post bad eq pics. Sure everyone has their "off" days and lets their heels pop up or doesn't wear a helmet or whatever... but that is NOT the point. The point being made with this blog is that these people are trying to sell these horses for BIG money- tens of thousands of dollars. If you are asking that much the least you can do is go in the barn, dig out some decent looking clothes, and take the time to take enough pics that you can have one where your eq is nice. I mean... 80,000 dollars-I want to see that horse glitter!

Virginia's Stupid Drivers said...

Golightly, I wasn't against the helmet policy or whatever you may call it. I've busted one too many helmets in my riding 'life' and would much rather have the potential 'save' versus it being inevitable that my head be kicked in if something happened. Always have worn a helmet, always will, it's been 15 years now so I wasn't harking on the helmet factor. I just felt that you were a bit crass. Obviously helmets have limitations, like motorcylces, there for just in case and for the minor... but have an extreme wreck and you're dead, same applies with horses.

Of course rereading your post I was out of line at this point. Not a good idea to get hot under the collar talking politics then coming here to read what I thought you said the first time. Either way, I'd much rather wear a helmet then not. I'm a western gamer and 90% I'm the only one with a helmet, oh well.

Ignorance is bliss.

GoLightly said...

Hey, I'm misunderstood all the time. I am lousy at communicating with humans. No biggie.
Just saw a show-jumping calendar at the mall, with all the greats.
Nick Skelton, Katie Monahan-Prudent, Ludger Beerbaum. Have you heard of any of them? Gasp, they are ALL shown with their heels up!! Guess they need outed as bad riders, too.
Crass seems to be the norm for this blog. The language is appalling. I guess I got caught up in the spirit of the blog, for which I apologize.

I get tired of sneers when none are deserved. Sneering is something the horse world should do less. Education never starts with a sneer.
I was a show-jumper, worked for some pretty great riders. None of them wore hats when schooling. Their choice.
Even Fugly rides hatless. I don't see TrainerX sneering at her.
It's a choice for grown-ups to make.
Ride a greenie over a five foot fence, and watch your heels, if he pops his back up at you. It's really hard to hold the "perfect" position. The first time it happened to me, my trainer laughed his head off. It's the coolest feeling.
The perfect position is a tool, for educating riders.
I'm surprised the WP horse was sneered at for his cluttered picture, and not the position of the rider. She needs to put her heels down.

Trainer X said...

Golightly~ I appreciate your comments, let me just clear something up. I with out question understand that our heels will slide up and that we will break a green horse or jump with out a helmet from time to time. My point with this segment was if you're going to put an $80k price tag on your horse, have a little pride and take a better picture. That's all. Rider #1 has excellent hand position and looks up nicely, but if I'm looking to spend that kind of $$$$ I want a picture that looks like the price.

GoLightly said...

Hey, if we had $80,000.00 to blow on a horse, we wouldn't be bitchin' here anyway would we?
I still say the real horseman looking for a great jumper will see that's a great jumper.
And will care less that the Groom is riding him. He's a good rider. The horse barely notices him, and that's the mark of a good 'un.
Just saying, is all.
Find a picture of a BAD rider on a great horse, selling for $80,000.00, THEN I'll shut up!
Well, I make no promises there...
Have a great day!!

Trainer X said...

This one??
I do appreciate your input by the way. Thank you :)

GoLightly said...

What, was the ammie class full??
That mare needs to be up-graded, she's a saint. Oh, my, you could tell in the first (I only watched half of first and half of last)video, not with the horse's motion, at all111. Oh, my. Oh, dear. I want that mare, just so she doesn't have to have that expression on her face anymore.
AAAAAAgghhh, we're still alive, my poor back, my feet. What a trier.
I saw it in the picture, just had to check the video to be sure. Yeah, the mare NEEDS a new home. Betcha she needs chiro. I could mean the mare, or the rider, y'know. Ow, ow.
A month off would help the mare, alot... And the girl could do a few hundred hours without stirrups, in two-point, oh, on a really springy-dingy horse. Yeah, that would help, alot. Chiro.
The vidoes were hysterical.
Oooh, whew, ooooh, whew, another SUPER dooper long spot, whew..
Amateur, Bordering On Dangerous.

Nice mare, bad rider.
You rock.

Thank goodness she's wearing a helmet:)

Trainer X said...

golightly~ That mare is seriously a killer mare!! Especially to keep jumping while being kicked in the flank everytime! YIKES did you see her legs swinging??? She needs to raise the stirrups up! She's not riding dressage!! The Mare I kill to have though!!
golightly said...A month off would help the mare, alot... And the girl could do a few hundred hours without stirrups, in two-point, oh, on a really springy-dingy horse. Yeah, that would help, alot. Chiro.
The vidoes were hysterical.

LMAO!!!! NO KIDDING!!!! Hahhahaha

CATALYST. said...

Last picture = a flash is in use. Consider the lighting conditions in a covered arena, please.

GoLightly said...

Snork, yeah, that's it.
Her eyeballs are NOT popping out of her head, she isn't stretched to the max. She doesn't have the riders chest and body weight thrown on her forehand.
Yeah, ok.
C'mon Catalyst.I didn't say anything that, if you're a jumper rider, you hadn't seen in the picture.
More flat work, people. So what if you hate that idea??
Jumping starts on the flat. If you don't like flat, don't Jump!
George has been tactfully bemoaning this type of riding for years. He wishes he'd never even said crest release, I'll betcha.
All it really means is don't jerk the horse in the mouth, over the damn fence!! Leave the horse alone, to do the actual work, and be a feather on his back, so he CAN.
How often do any of you see the truly correct automatic release, in the ammies/wanne-be open jumperss??? Hmmm, not so many.
Heck, to keep the ammies happy, the pros do it too, but they don't HAVE to.
Over 'n out.
(adjusting tin hat)

GoLightly said...

Whoops, sorry, Catalyst.
You meant the dressage picture.

I will now, officially stfu. And read more slowly, and not be such a frickin' witch.

I mean, I'll TRY.
night night.

Havocec said...

Nicest thing I ever saw for a sale horse. One came over from Poland. He had his own brochure just like the cars in the show room. And at a quarter mil..he deserved his own brochure.

For tens of thousands... it's ot hard to take a few nice pics. Everyone can point and click.

Havocec said...

but I can't spell today so pay me no mind:)