Friday, February 27, 2009

Math is Fun!

So I met this woman last week, who has claimed to have traveled around the world training horses ever since she ran away from home at 14. Well the years of living her life with booze have worn her down a bit and although she claims to be 33 she looks more like late fifties...

She proceeded to tell me and S&D that since she started training horses at 14 she's broke over 4,000. Um... Let's do some math on that shall we... OK, 14 from 33 puts us at 19 years of horse training. 4,000 horses divided by 19 years gives us 210.52 horses broke a year. Which puts us at 1 broke horse ever day and half... Uhhh I'm just going to come out and say it....BULL SHIT! And even if it is semi true then what is the quality of said "broke" horses?? Hmmmm?

She was one of those women who was an absolute know-it-all. Her way is the right way and even if she couldn't tell you why her way was better, that didn't matter it just was... She was very harsh with her horses and rode them even harder. She was about the domination of the horse. If it was standing still while ground tied and lowered it's head even a little to sniff the dirt she would yank on it's face so hard and scream at it... She was someone who'd I would never let touch one of my horses, EVER!!! She rode every horse with spurs and there was no mercy. If the screwed up, even in the tiniest way, there was going to be hell to pay. There were several times that S&D and I had to ask her to mellow out with the horses, it was getting to be way to much for us to bear. She would go on and on with stories of her breaking horses and "how to show them who was boss." You know I'm just never quite sure where on earth these people come from??

Believe me when I tell you that there were a couple times in our conversations with this woman that I really, really wanted to call her out on her BS. But, she seemed to think she was cool and fitting in...

Part of it is sad, part of it pathetic and sick. But I suppose there is no point teaching an old dog new tricks. With people like this, the proverbial "know it alls", sometimes it's better just to nod your head and then walk away...

Maybe she's a braggart, maybe she wanted to impress us, but I will tell you one thing. Isn't math fun???

14 comments:

SweetPea said...

Those types are the worst. I tell you, I'm not sure I could have kept my mouth shut... Those types drive me bonkers!! And tact was not something I majored in :)

S&D said...

HAHA!! You know she was full of the brown stuff when I called her to see about riding the flipper and she backed down...

Trainer X said...

LMFAO!!!! You're damn right!!!

CCH said...

A 14 year old runaway, no matter how grown up she is now, screams intelligence. Doesn't it??

Trainer X said...

a 14 yr old runaway with 5 kids mind you.... She told us she hadn't seen them in 5 years. AWESOME!

kestrel said...

The quickest way to 'spot the stupid person' is to look for the ones that know it all!
I rode with a fabulous cowboy when I was a kid, and he was always quiet around horses and people both. He just let his horses do the talking for him. Man, they were something, too!

clara said...

there's a lady at my barn like that. worst part is that our horses are half siblings so according to her me and my horses business is her bussiness too. one day she wanted me to ride her horse and i was like ok sure. one problem her horse was in heat and is a nightmare. and she doesn't get disciplined at all. so i'm leading her into the arena and this mare puts her muzzle to my ear and SCREAMS at the top of my lungs. omg i let her have it but only for a couple of seconds. just enough for her to get that that is not ok, and the stupid owner started yelling at me for discipling the horse. i didn't even hit the horse. i backed her up and got her refocused on me. oh yeah your poor mare is going to be scared for life!

clara said...

*oops i meant her lungs*

paul_linn_is_a_jerk said...

Wow. 5 kids. 4,000 horses broken. She wins!! I have never 'broken' a horse. I prefer to train them.

Actually, she sounds pathetically insecure. The really sad part is that there are quite a few 'trainers' out there just like her. I feel sorry for the horses.

http://paullinnthoroughbredcheater.blogspot.com/

ponykins said...

Give some people enough rope, and they will hang themselves with their lack of knowledge. I get people out all the time bragging that their horse "could have" been a national champion, except that the bank repo'ed it, it hung itself while tied to the truck rearview mirror, someone left the gate open and it got hit on the road, the list is endless.(and often amusing)

lachellesays said...

On an unrelated note...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3o19YIzmr-k

WTF?

Sorry. I know I'm off topic all the time.

clydesdalesocks said...

Oh, I hate people like that. But what I hate even MORE is know-it-all people that have no right to know-it-all (not than anyone has a right to be a know-it-all).

There was a lady at a barn I worked at and she was always spouting she had "40 years of horse experience". When I inquired, it came out she had a pony when she was 6 and an old broken down mare several years ago that she didn't ride, just would go out and give carrots to and pet. So yeah, she's the horse guru, or so SHE thought. Now, little old me at the time was about to finish up my Bachelor's in Animal Science with an Equine Concentration. But apparently I knew nothing compared to her "40 years of horse experience."

Her 40 years of horse experience couldn't see that the mare with the huge cresty neck and sunken spine was disgustingly overweight. She apparently didn't know horse anatomy because she kept saying she could see the horse's hip bones so that must mean it was too thin. Ummm...if the horse had enough fat to make her hips completely flat with her barrel, it would be dead.

Secondly, and this was what I found absolutely disgusting, her "40 years of horse experience" (which never included working with foals or anything even younger than like 15 years old) told her that putting a stud chain over the nose of a 6 month old filly and yanking on it was the correct way to halter break a baby. This was with Clydesdales, and I know she was about 14 hands and was around 800 lbs at 6 months, but she couldn't seem to get it in her thick skull that THIS WAS A BABY. Needless to say, the filly started attacking anyone who came in her stall (and by attacking I mean like angry dog attacking, ears pinned, teeth barred, and she'd double barrel you if she got the chance). I don't blame her, if every time I was taken out I had a chain put over my nose and yanked on, I would be reluctant to leave with anyone. And what was truly unfortunate for this baby, the barn owner had no spine and was apparently afraid of this woman with "40 years horse experience" so even though I continuously pleaded for her to make that woman stop using the chain and stop making the other employees use the chain, it did nothing. Though, every time someone was on MY shift, you better believe they got chewed out and written up for using that damn chain.

I can't say where exactly this was, but if anyone is seriously interested in knowing, e-mail (sarafoster@alumni.clemson.edu) me and I'll tell you. The only saving grace is this barn is no longer allowed to have babies.

GoLightly said...

Nothing pertinent to add. It's all been said:)

If you think you know it all, you're a fool.

Golden Girl said...

I guess that I still have a low tolerance for stupidity... I still get annoyed at the gal's that claim to have trained 100s of horses; and I know they are all younger than I. I guess I concentrate on quality, not quantity! LOL