Monday, February 23, 2009

Shut the Hell Up...Please!

So as most horse owners know, EVERYONE happens to have an opinion. How to train your horse, how to ride it, what bit to use, not to use. It's really quite overwhelming and quite annoying. So #1 How do you find some to trust and #2 When do you tell certain people to shut the hell up.

You need to do your research. It seems as though now it is very prevalent for green riders to acquire green horse (WHY?!?! I have no idea). NOW with that being said you have the blind leading the blind and EVERYONE will be vomiting information at you. IF you do some homework, find a good trainer or aren't quite as much of a beginner as everyone thinks you are, then you're in luck.

What most first time horse owners find is that everyone bombards them with info and what you should/have to do. Now you want to talk to these people and get all the insight you can. Take it all how you want it. BUT, What do you when it becomes too much?? I tell my clients... "You need to know when to tell them to shut up with a smile on your face." You NEVER want to hurt any ones feelings or seem ungrateful, but there comes a time when you have to say "No thank you. This is my horse, but I appreciate your help." You don't want to burn any bridges you just need to make sure that there is a clear message coming their way that says. "Shut it."

And again, it's NOT in any way that you want to be rude or ungrateful it's just that we all know what too many cooks in the kitchen does... Don't ever look a gift horse in the mouth, just KNOW when to take control of your own horse.


Paigeley said...

i really just loovvee the ones that can't even trot and advise you on how your cantering looks like a sack of potatoes and needs immediate fixing

EveryoneThinksThey'reGoodDrivers said...

I just walk/ride away while they are talking. It works after a while.

Trainer X said...

LMAO!!! I know!!! Damn!

CCH said...

I usually say something like "hmm, you think, well maybe..." and then change the subject or move on.

I will say that of all the horse people with opinions I run into, I've yet to find someone with a "degree" from some sort of horse college program that has anything worthwhile to say. Sad commentary on education, but I think their money would be better spent taking lessons or working for someone already established.

GoLightly said...

CCH said:
"Sad commentary on education, but I think their money would be better spent taking lessons or working for someone already established."
Hear, hear!!

I used to just pretend I was deaf, and dumb. (NO smart remarks, pleez, thx) Or, pretend I didn't understand. BUT, that's after I knew what I was doing.
It's really tough, as a beginner/ novice, to "block out" the all-knowing peoples. You know,the ones who've been riding for two years..

Yeah, WHY do green riders buy GREEN horses?
I do not get that.
You end up with a broken-up green rider, and a totally annoyed, badly broke harse.
(Usually, not saying always)
Usually, though.
sorry I was late, TrexX. I'm usually FIRST!
(well, in my OWN mind)

Tricky said...

Why is this happening so much? Green riders, usually in their mid-teens wanting green-broke or worse still off the track horses. I want to strangle them.
I often get told it's because those horses are cheaper. If that's the case, don't have a horse for 6 months, and that $2,000 you have budgeted to buy the horse will turn into about $10,000 to buy a GOOD horse. It will also be cheaper on hospital bills for yourself, and may allow you to keep working, instead of being in traction.

If everyone thinks you're stupid then they tend not to bother with telling you stuff unless you ask :)

Slave to the Horse

horspoor said...

Or on the flip side of this, novices that ask you what you think about something. Don't like what they hear, or it sounds like too much work. So they ask 15 other people till they get the answer they want to hear.

EveryoneThinksThey'reGoodDrivers said...

I was just having this conversation with a friend the other day.

We think that most people who offer unsolicited advise genuinely believe they are imparting knowledge to help others.

I've never had anyone say anything snotty to me, but I've had people tell me "a curb strap does not need to go on a snaffle" and "if the horse is broke it should be in a curb" and "you really should wear a helmet."

This is all I can remember for the moment but they are all advice to help, not to be cranky.

Yes, these people are annoying - at some point they will figure out unsolicited advice is unwelcome in most crowds.

kestrel said...

Don't take advice about child rearing from people whose kids are all in prison, don't take marital advice from miserably divorced people, and don't take horse training advice from people who have asshole horses!
Most of the REALLY good trainers will wait for you to ask a question. The people who have watched expensive vidios and are still leading their horse around after 2 years of training are usually the most vocal, strangely enough.
I usually just smile and I'm riding away.

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The Pale Horseman said...

My normal response is "well, maybe but I might try (insert method here) first."

When my horses played up I have a friend who always used to do the "I'll ride her if you want" crap. Thankfully she doesn't do it very often but when she does I normally just say; "No thanks. She's my horse and I have to learn to ride out the problem myself."
It finalises that I don't want her to ride my horse for me without sounding nasty.

Amy said...

I have a barefoot trimmre, and I really like the way she does my horses' feet. But she has some very strong opinions on certain subjects that she likes to share, like "bits are bad, you should ride in a bitless bridle", or "processed feeds are bad, yopu should feed whole grains." I really think she is just trying to help, but it's one of those things, I pay her to trim my horses' feet, not plan their meals....

oldtimer said...

Most good trainers will wait for you to ask. (Unless there is a situation involving *immediate* risk!) The rest generally are not worth listening to.