Thursday, September 17, 2009

Top 10

This was sent to me via an email and I thought it was too good not too share!!!! Enjoy!

10. Drop a heavy steel object on your foot. Don't pick it up right away. Shout, "Get off, Stupid, GET OFF!"

9. Leap out of a moving vehicle and practice "relaxing into the fall." Roll lithely into a ball and spring to your feet.

8. Learn to grab your checkbook out of your purse and write out a $1000 check without even looking down.

7. Jog long distances carrying a halter and a carrot. Go ahead and tell the neighbors what you are doing - they might as well know now.

6. Affix a pair of reins to a moving freight train and practice pulling to a halt. Smile as if you are having fun.

5. Hone your fibbing skills: "See, moving hay bales is FUN!" and "No, really, I'm glad your lucky performance and multimillion dollar horse won the blue ribbon. I am just thankful that my hard work and actual ability won me second place."

4. Convince yourself that being bucked off 7 times makes you a "REAL RIDER"

3. Borrow the US Army's slogan: Be All That You Can Be -- bitten, thrown, kicked, slimed, trampled, frozen...

2. Lie face down in a puddle of mud in your most expensive riding clothes and repeat to yourself, "This is a learning experience, this is a learning experience, this is ......."

1. The number one exercise to become a better equestrian is MARRY MONEY !


SweetPea said...

Ahhh... totally forgot about #1. I soooo did that wrong!!

The rest I have down to a fine science.

FlyingHorse2 said...

I didn't get #1 either but I think I passed all the rest of them years ago. My husband just went for a blood pressure check.... #1 might be down the road a ways......Just kiddin' (cya)

adrienne said...


I am still working on #1! No luck yet...plan B is to win the lottery!e

GoLightly said...

I had a chance at number 1.

Stupid standards, if only I'd dropped them;)