When you're a horse person who has lost confidence in your ability what are you supposed to do? Well, it just so happens I am currently working with a lady who lost hers... Her horse started kicking out and charging on the lunge line. She was terrified. Every time her horse did that she had him put away immediately. So I went out there and did a wee bit of butt kicking and then showed her EXACTLY how I did it.... Her fear was that once I left her horse would start up the tude again on the lunge. So I have her doing simple things with her horse that she can not fail at. Walking, backing, grooming, tying. Picking up his feet. Just some basic ground control.
The idea is, is when a person loses their confidence to make it so they can not be set up to fail. By doing some simple things that she feels she can handle appropriately, she is slowly starting to regain her confidence back... And that's what it takes, slow simple steps, without the fear of the big "FAIL" clouding her head. It's been several days and while I'm going back out there twice a week for awhile for lessons, her confidence is happily on it's way back up :)
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
I've never solved a horse's fear by scaring them worse...or a rider's! Confidence comes from success.
i used to be scared of lunging my horse. he was really hard to control on the line and even ripped my finger open once. he was fine in every other department but the lunging was awful so my riding instructor lunged him a few times and now he is a pro. sometimes it takes someone else to win the fight first before you can handle it.
Whoa! This is kismet for me and thank you for addressing it. Just yesterday, my otherwise docile TWH, except for seasonal temperature changes like now, turns into the stallion he used to be. It was a first yesterday in the round pen. I typically free lunge him only in the round pen. He goes on a lunge in the indoor arena if the weather is crappy and usually I can handle these seasonal acting out moments because they are temporary...except yesterday he scared the piss out of me when all I wanted was for him to transition from a running walk to a canter, I cracked the whip when he ignored me for the 3rd time and the gates of hell opened up...he bucked full rear toward me (safe distance...but still!)he went into a full all out gallop. I let him be a jerk for a minute to let him run out this hotness(I think I was in shock at this point and trying to keep ahead of the situation). I cued him to come into the center which (go figure) he heeded and stopped about a foot from me (I refused to budge and held my hands up over my head) he stood there snorting and blowing all over me. I wasn't sure if he was just winded or trying to pull rank. I was so scared and instead conveyed an incredible anger for dissing me. Man was I pissed! But I'm not a beater...so I was conflicted on how to correct the situation. I was afraid he was so hot that if I even remotely swung that whip he would explode all over again. I wanted to punch him but I didn't. So I walked him on the lead around the pen...both ways. I needed to walk it out also and to see if he was going to be too hot to handle without help. I realized I was so scared I had to tack him up and get on him before the post traumatic stress set in and I stayed away for 4 months like I did 3 years ago when I fell off of him (my fault). So I put a saddle on him, brought him back to the round pen where he was far better behaved and actually listened to my cues. I could see it was safe to get on him in an outdoor arena. I rode him for about 45 minutes going through all the strides...only once feeling him pull up like he wanted take off. I was in tears, I was so scared and all I could think about was "FAIL!!". But I was not going to let him win. So it was a small success for me to get on him regardless of my fear. Did he sense it? Probably. But ultimately nothing happened and he seemed to chill with only an occasional correction that I could handle. But still...the course of events was very unsettleing. Today we will go back to lunging in an arena(the free lunge in the round pen will wait until I have someone with me to supervise..if I ever go back to free lunge that is). One thing I have learned from owning this horse...I will grow from this...they are the most humbling and confidence shattering and then confidence re-building beings one can have in life. The reward comes by working through fears but only in a safe manner. Free lunging can be a dangerous choice with lesser the experinenced. Thanks for addressing this and letting me vent.
There are two cases I recall losing my confidence, one longer than the other.
I was jumping higher than I should've been when I was younger. My horse balked, off I went. Went for the jump again, balked again, off I went. Third time he jumped it and I fell off on the other side. I don't believe I jumped for nearly 5 months. No one worked with me, which was the hard part. I took lessons, but they rarely did jumping and so when it came time I was literally trembling. The horse was a great horse, a real packer, but I think horses know how to gauge your experience too :)
The second confidence breaker I had no control over. The horse had a freak out while I was trying to get on, she launched me off her butt and square into the ground. I thought for sure I broke a rib and I was coughing up blood. It hurt remarkably bad, I pretty much rolled all over to try and get my breath back. Unfortunately I was unable to get back on the horse to correct her behavior, so it not only gave her the sense she won... but I also was half-timid about mounting her again. Of course I overrode this about a week later, but I'm also older than I was when I fell off jumping.
Fun stuff *rolls eyes* lol
Interesting that you're addressing this topic right now. Just Friday I took my mother-in-law to a Western Pleasure lesson with my neighbor's 4H leader. I told her ahead of time that my mom-in-law was REALLY nervous and insecure so she was prepared. My mom-in-law lunged for a long time, finally came to the arena and took her time getting on. She rode about ten feet and got off crying. Debbie talked to her on the ground for a while and assured her that she had nothing to be ashamed about. She finally convinced her to get on her horse and just sit there and stand still and talk. They sat on their horses and talked for probably half and hour. Then she got her to walk little circles and figure eights. By the time we left my mother-in-law was so happy! She felt good about the session and the horse and taking lessons. It was an awesome lesson because Debbie set her up to succeed and not get scared again. My mom-in-law used to be fearless but she spent the last year dealing with health issues that affected her balance and caused her to fall off almost every time she rode. I finally got her to put her horse in training and ride her husbands gelding to get over her fears. It seems to be working.
Confidence with horses can be so rewarding and can also be taken away quickly. It's just always important to never set yourself up for failure :) Small confidence building blocks will make a WORLD of difference!
I lost quite a bit of confidence in spring of this year... We just bought two horses and we were trying one out (my sister was riding the newbie), I accompanied her on my faithful mare. We decided to canter the edge of the field. My sister was a tad in front (we were not racing, merely cantering)... when her horse jumped sideways. I felt my mare wanting to follow but she dropped it and kept straight,when only a milisecond later, decided to join her friend and jump sideways. There was nothing in the field or woods... as I was looking over to spot what had spooked my new mare... she jumped at the exact time I wasn't paying attention, went flying to the side, barely missing my mares feet... this tok about 3 seconds to happen, but it felt like forever. While I was falling, my left foot twisted in the stirrup and I sprained my ankle... I remember it hurting before I even touched the ground! I landed hard on the ground on my right shoulder blade / shoulder, knocked the wind out of me... my sister told me that I was lying there for about a minute before I could breathe... felt like 5 for me! But all I could feel was my ankle. I got back on my horse from the off side (what a pain!) and rode her back to the barn (I couldn't walk so why waste a good ride?!?! I got to the barn, untacked, brushed and put my mare away... then worried about my ankle, but by that time, it was so swollen that I couldn't take my boot off. Didn't see a doctor, spent 2 weeks on crutches... I just started to canter with confidence almost 4 months later... Now, I can run with my horse and I feel ok (not great but ok), the cantering is back to normal... Confidence is the easiest thing to lose but the hardest to gain back.
Post a Comment